"Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day. But set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."

"What our ancestors would really be thinking, if they were alive today, is: 'Why is it so dark in here?'"

"Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time."

"This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic."

"Sometimes glass glitters more than diamonds because it has more to prove."

"An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on."

"Prepare yourself for the world, as the athletes used to do for their exercise; oil your mind and your manners, to give them the necessary suppleness and flexibility; strength alone will not do."

"A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch."

"Till a man can judge whether they be truths or not, his understanding is but little improved, and thus men of much reading, though greatly learned, but may be little knowing."

"A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him."

"Eliminating what is not wanted or needed is profitable in itself."

"People need to be reminded more often than they need to be instructed."